i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
