He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
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