I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
