I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Boobs speak an international language.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
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