But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
