I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize
