"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Randomize
