Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
