I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
