Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
