I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
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