I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
