I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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