I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
