new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
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Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
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If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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