How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
operation have a gay friend backfired
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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