idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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