Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Randomize