I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
