no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize