I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Randomize