I think I can smell my own vagina right now
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
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