so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
