we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Randomize
