I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Randomize
