Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
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