this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize
