Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
