So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
