I'm lost and stupid without you.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
