Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Of course I have a pirate flag
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
