Its about making memories worth repressing
No more Irish car bombs ever.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
