You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
