woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
