i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
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