so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
