Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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