The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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