Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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