So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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