Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
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