Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize