I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
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