my shit smells like andre
Best friends brother. Beat that.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
This is classic penis vs brain.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
