why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
