i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
It was confusing and full of hummus
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
