i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Randomize