my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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