just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I FOUND THE LEGS
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