you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Randomize
