He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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